The Return to The Fly...

Right.
For those of you who haven't been keeping up on current events here at WhiteRussianOnline, DOV is banned from the Fly.
The reasons for this are complex, and the full story can be found by clicking here, but basically in a moment of drunken logic he decided to steal a drinks promoters hat and make a run for it.
Obviously the bouncers chased him down like a dog and told him not to come back.

Which brings us to this article:
Using the same logic that got us into this shit in the first place, we wondered just how sharp the bouncers at the Fly really are.
Would DOV be able to get back in wearing the worlds worst wig and the worlds biggest, thickest glasses...?
Read on...

Now this really is a shitty disguise.
The wig is from an Austin Powers costume and the glasses are my backup, backup NHS specials: as big as a pair of Aviators but without the cool.

In fact, it is entirely likely that they were employed in an early Doctor Who episode. The Kolonel shows us what that might have looked like:

The plan was simple: get the gear on and simply walk by - employing the age old method of saying, "Evening", to the bouncers on the way in to throw them off guard.
       
Drawback #1:                            Drawback #2:
The Wig Sucks. Even a              As Big Phil shows, the Glasses  
blind man could see the bits        are so strong you need excellent
of felt sticking through               eyesight just to see through them!

In order to demonstrate the awesome transformation powers of the Wig and Glasses, we employed the help of the famous but elusive Mighty Q:

(Mighty Q before the transformation: one man in black, wondering where his Ferrari is parked...)

(... Mighty Q after the transformation: one man in beige, wondering where his next pint is coming from)

The J-man was in charge of taking "The Money Shot"; trying to fit the Bouncer in the frame as I (maybe) got through the front door.
In true J-man style, he did us proud, and got this awesome shot:


We were in!
With a "Evening" to the Bouncer, confused and blinded by the J-man firing a flash bulb inches from his face, we sauntered past; making a mockery of both them and their rules! Mwahahaha!!

(The Kolonel celibrates. We Rock).


(The J-mans Evil Camp Twin toasts our success)


(J-man makes Big Phil feel at home by impersonating someone from the 60's, the period when Big Phil was growing up. 
Unfortunately Big Phils nostalgia gives him the unresistable desire to suckle, and the J-mans finger was just in the right place at the right time...)

It was around this point that we spotted the Fish Bowl Challenge, which we successfully completed to further mock The Fly and their petty attempts to bring about our deaths.